The Then and Now of YOU

It’s something that is often not talked about, but I believe it happens more than we think. Feeling completely lost, stuck, unsure about ourselves, our plans and who we are. In a world where it seems that everyone is on a path to somewhere and has everything under control…why don’t we?

For me, after having our daughter, I found that life had completely changed. There was a new schedule (a very unpredictable one of course), I made brand new friends from my new mom’s group, new activities to go to, a new body, no time for myself and, a feeling of fatigue all the time. It was just strange, yet everyone around me was still going about their business, looking so put together and alive.

I felt alone…especially because I no longer felt like myself. It felt like I was literally saying goodbye to my old self, unsure if or when my new self would reemerge.

But as with most things, I just needed time. I needed to take many deep breaths, grin and bare the bad days and just know that I had to be gentle with myself and my new circumstances. That my daughter was now my focus and this is how life was going to be and that was okay.

What I found during time, was that there was something I needed in order to feel most like me again. I needed to be creative. And this new identity (temporarily) took that away from me.

Fast forward a couple years, I now have a bit more time to get in the studio, to focus on something other than diaper changes and rushing to music class. I can focus on myself a little more and what I want again. Some may view this as selfish or not being content with just being a mom but I see it as being a mom who has not given up on herself or her goals. Has recognized what makes her come alive and what she can (still) contribute to the world.

The biggest take away I have found is the realization that my old self was still around and very much contributed to who I was becoming, and who I am today. And instead of fighting the distance that was felt, I now feel empowered by the journey of myself pre-baby and post-baby.

So I want to encourage you with this…

Wherever you are, just know that the past and the present can work together to move you forward.

It may not be possible to do all the things now, but rest assured that time will become available again and being you is still possible. Your old self is not completely forgotten, in fact she is very much still with you.

Enjoy the print out below and use it as a visual of how the overlap of your past and your present could look. Do you notice the opportunity where your past self and your present self overlap?! Let that be a place of exploration and expansion!